


Strength

by kiyala



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Getting Together, M/M, Pining, Road Trips, University
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-08 21:24:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10396485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiyala/pseuds/kiyala
Summary: Tanaka and Noya go for a weekend away with Bokuto and Kuroo. Tanaka wonders if this will be his chance to gather his courage and tell Noya how he feels without backing down.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [killuazcldyck](https://archiveofourown.org/users/killuazcldyck/gifts).



The road trip is Bokuto's idea. He suggests it the moment that he finds out that Tanaka can drive and his excitement is infectious, the same way that Noya's laughter is. Perhaps Tanaka just has a tendency to befriend these sorts of people, but he definitely isn't complaining when Bokuto is so much fun; he and Noya are starting members of their university volleyball team and it only makes sense that they'd hang out outside of practice when they know each other already. Tanaka's there because Noya is, just the same way that Kuroo is there because of Bokuto. 

The four of them feel like unlikely friends, but they get along with each other well. When Bokuto wants to go on a road trip together, he doesn't even need to say who he means. Kuroo doesn't mind where he's going, as long as he doesn't need to give directions. Noya wants to go somewhere that overlooks the ocean and somehow, they end up deciding on Matsushima, back in Miyagi, way past their hometown. It's a four and a half hour drive from Tokyo. Tanaka's lucky he enjoys driving. 

They start early, in the hopes of getting to Matsushima by lunch time. Noya calls shotgun and sits with his feet up on the dashboard and the window wound down, the wind tousling his hair as Tanaka drives. It's distracting, but then so is the way that Bokuto and Kuroo are leaning into each other in the back seat, smiling in that soft, secretive way that they've done ever since they've started dating. Tanaka glances in the rearview mirror and then glances away, swallowing around the lump in his throat that he's learned to recognise as jealousy. 

"You're the best, Ryuu," Noya murmurs happily, perching his sunglasses on the top of his head and shutting his eyes contentedly. "I'm glad Bokuto had this idea. This is going to be the best." 

"Yeah," Tanaka agrees, feeling his stomach do a strange, excited flip at the thought of spending the weekend with Noya.

It doesn't even make sense for him to be this eager, when they're roommates at university anyway, but this is a different context. It isn't like being at university, or visiting home together either. It's something new and Tanaka can't help but think that maybe over this weekend, he'll work up the nerve to actually say something to Noya, to pull him aside when Bokuto and Kuroo are doing their couple thing together, and actually say all the things that have been on the tip of his tongue since high school. 

Or, Tanaka thinks with a sigh, he could just chicken out the way that he alway does. He tries to push that thought out of his mind, but it's annoyingly persistent. He does his best to keep it from showing, knowing that Noya will pick up on the fact that something is wrong and then immediately ask about it. Tanaka's not good at lying to Noya—he respects his best friend too much to even try in the first place but that aside, he's certain that Noya knows him well enough to see right through him anyway. 

"Hey," Kuroo speaks up, and when Tanaka glances at him through the rearview mirror, there's a look in his eyes that feels a little too knowing for comfort. "Tanaka, you've been driving for a good two and a half hours now. Why don't we pull over for a break? We can stretch our legs, too."

"Yeah!" Bokuto agrees. "That sounds really good, actually. Let's do that."

"Yuu?" Tanaka asks, looking over at Noya. It immediately feels like a mistake; the morning light hits Noya at a certain angle and it makes him look _perfect_. Tanaka's chest clenches up with longing and he's glad he needs to turn back to the road because he can barely breathe around the sudden lump in his throat.

"Let's do it," Noya replies. "You deserve the break. I'll get you some melon bread."

"You're the best," Tanaka says and he means it wholeheartedly, the way he always does when he utters those words to Noya. "Alright. I'll find a good place to stop."

There's a rest station just twenty minutes ahead and Tanaka pulls into a parking bay, not realising just how much he needs the break until he's finally stopped the car. He leans back against his seat with a sigh, pulling his sunglasses off to rub his eyes. 

Noya punches him gently in the arm. "Next time you need a break, just say so, okay?"

"Didn't realise how much I needed one," Tanaka admits, and Noya doesn't punch him again so much as just rest his knuckles against Tanaka's shoulder, the gesture comforting and reprimanding all at once. 

"I'm going to be keeping an eye on you, then. I'll make sure that at least I know when you need another break."

"I'll probably be fine," Tanaka replies. "It's just a two hour drive from here."

"Well, just in case," Noya huffs. "Let me look out for you."

Tanaka nods, suddenly incapable of actually speaking. He's glad that Bokuto and Kuroo have already gotten out of the car; if Kuroo has figured out how Tanaka feels, this would just make everything even worse.

"Hey, Noya!" Bokuto calls. "There's a convenience store this way! Let's go!"

"Heck yeah," Noya grins. "Ryuu, stay right here. Snacks are my shout."

"You don't have to—" Tanaka begins but Noya is already getting out of the car, walking away with Bokuto.

When Tanaka opens his door, he finds Kuroo leaning against the car, clearly waiting for him. Tanaka sighs, his shoulders slumping. So Kuroo _has_ figured it out. He's always been way too perceptive.

"Look," Kuroo says with a quiet laugh. "I'm not going to make you talk about it if you don't want to. It's just that I recognise exactly where you are. I've been there too, you know."

Tanaka doesn't reply at first, but just as Kuroo is about to turn away, he clears his throat. "Does this… ever get easier to deal with?"

Kuroo raises an eyebrow. "You're asking for an honest answer, aren't you? Hell no, it doesn't get any easier. Why do you think Kou and I both gave up on that? I was so nervous I'd screw everything up, but the thought of just sitting on this secret forever was way worse. Besides, before anything else, we're best friends. I knew that even if he didn't feel the same, we'd work it out in the end. Maybe it would be awkward for a while, but I knew our friendship would be able to survive the worst case scenario. It felt good to get it off my chest and tell him what I've been feeling for years, though. The rest worked out pretty well too."

"I'm so jealous," Tanaka mutters without thought. He freezes up when he realises what he's said, but Kuroo just grins at him.

"You're always so unfailingly honest about what you're thinking. You're kind of like Kou that way. Maybe he would have been the better person to talk to you about this. I know it sucked for him to keep everything bottled up. It's probably the same for you, huh?"

Tanaka shrugs, looking away. "I've wanted to tell him, for the longest time, but it never ends up happening. It's the worst. Almost as bad as just lying to him but at least then, he'd call me out on it."

"I'm not going to tell you whether or not you should talk to him," Kuroo says. "That's your decision to make. Whatever you do, I really hope it works for you."

Noya comes back with a whole shopping bag of melon bread for Tanaka, pushing it into his hands with a laugh. Tanaka feels warm and fond and it doesn't even matter that both Bokuto and Kuroo are watching with knowing smiles.

The second half of the trip feels easier after they've all stretched their legs and had something to eat. Noya has a road trip playlist he's made specifically for this trip and it's a good mix of catchy songs to sing along to and older songs that they grew up with. Noya is good at playlists; he seems to know the perfect combination of feelings to express through each song he picks, but Tanaka knows that he's biased. No matter what Noya put together, he'd still think it was the best thing ever and it _would be_ , as far as he's concerned, just because of Noya.

When they finally get to Matsushima, Noya sticks his head out of the window, taking in the sighs as Tanaka drives. "Ryuu! I can see the pines over there, look!"

"Hey, cool!" Bokuto rolls his window down, hanging out of it as far as his seatbelt will let him. "Tetsu, come here and check this out!"

"We'll get a better look when we actually go to see them properly," Kuroo points out, but he smiles as he lets Bokuto pull him close anyway.

Tanaka pulls up at the holiday house they're staying at for the weekend, already feeling relaxed just for not being in the city and not being on the road any more. They haven't brought a lot with them, so it's easy to move their belongings out of the car and into the comfortably sized two-bedroom place. It's not the first time Tanaka and Noya have shared a room, or a bed. Tanaka isn't nervous about that at all, but finds himself wondering if he should be. Then again, he and Noya are so used to this that they've already claimed their sides of the bed without even having to talk about it. Tanaka figures that he'll save his freaking out for the things that he actually _does_ need to freak about, like the fact that it feels a little too easy to just take advantage of this brief moment of privacy while Bokuto and Kuroo are unpacking things in their own room.

"You look like you're about to say something," Noya tells him. "Or sneeze."

"Uh," Tanaka replies, and freaks out a little more. 

"Do you need to?" Noya asks slowly. Tanaka realises that Noya's doing that thing, where he reads Tanaka like an open book. It's both welcoming and terrifying at the same time. 

"Uh," Tanaka says again. He's used to Noya leaving him speechless, but it doesn't usually happen like this. He takes a deep breath and squares his shoulders. He can do this. He's carried the weight of an entire team on his shoulders as the ace, into match after match. That sort of thing is allowed to scare him. Being honest with his best friend shouldn't.

Kuroo is right, Tanaka realises. No matter what happens here, his friendship with Noya is strong enough to withstand it. This isn't something he can bottle up forever and if he's going to let it out, he wants it to be on his own terms.

When it all comes down to it, his choice is a lot simpler than he thought.

"I…" Tanaka looks into Noya's eyes, the way he always does when he needs strength. It works this time too. "I really like you. I mean. Since high school, I've—"

"Ryuu," Noya says suddenly, his eyes bright and determined. It's all the warning Tanaka gets before Noya leaps forward. Tanaka isn't prepared to catch him and they both go crashing to the floor. It doesn't matter though, because Noya braces his hands on either side of Tanaka's head and leans in to kiss him. Tanaka sucks in a shaky breath, not quite believing this is really happening. He kisses back, until he hears a huff of amusement from the doorway.

"We heard a crash," Kuroo explains, his arms folded across his chest. "The two of you really don't know how to do anything quietly, do you?"

"Probably not," Tanaka murmurs, finding that he can't get the grin off his face no matter how hard he tries. "Noya's loud. It's one of the things I like about him."

"Same," Noya replies, sitting up and staying right where he is, on top of Tanaka. His eyes are shining, the way they always are when he's incredibly happy. He finds Tanaka's and and squeezes it in his own. "So, hey. If it wasn't obvious, I like you too."

They've only been at the holiday house for ten minutes, Tanaka's shoulders are digging uncomfortably into the floor, and they still haven't actually made any plans for what they're going to do while they're here, but this is already the best weekend of Tanaka's life.

"Yeah," he grins, squeezing back. "I figured you might."


End file.
